Reality TV news: Cheeky Girls' engagement, Matt cheated on Flavia, Myleene felt fat in bikini
Heatworld insists you HAVE to see these pictures from Lembit and Gabriela's engagement party. But I checked, and it turns out you don't.
There's a reality tv story intersection to beat them all, featuring as it does Strictly's Matt di Angelo, his dancing lover Flavia, Michelle from Liberty X, and the Daily Mail using the phrase "love rat".
And hold the front page! I have some breaking news you NEED to know before proceeding with your humdrum life... Apparently Myleene Klass felt fat in THAT bikini. No, rather misleadingly - not that one, that one.
It's not your conventional rose-scented fairy tale at the best of times, but now that a third larger-than-life character has entered the frame, the story of a Cheeky Girl and an adulterous politician has just become even more appetite destroying.
Every so often, a story comes along that makes a reality show blogger do a tiny dribble of excitement on her keyboard andclogupthespacebar. David Gest and Peter Andre (or Peter Andrew, as my fingers insist on typing) are going to be performing together in a new touring musical. Beginning in Wolverhampton,
Oh Jade. Try to remember to lock the bloody door. 

How about a
Once again, Panto would like to remind you that these opinions are reported, and are not necessarily our own. The rather sad fact is,
Has the Isle of Man really changed their name to "Isle of Sam" in honour of Sam Barks? And aren't they overdue another invasion, anyway? Thinking about it, she's got a whole island of nationalistic manxies on her side - there's a good chance that could help her win. Join the debate
Over the pond, 
Hmm. So, right, what do we know about Aisleyne? Recently spotted at Amy Winehouse's... wine house. Horrible clothing range. Hangs around with Charlie Brooker. Right. Your go.




