"Tiny lady" to enter Big Brother house?

A belly-dancing star of Australian Big Brother, Rima Hadchiti, has been at the centre of controversy down under after nude pictures of her appeared on the internet. Since entering the spotlight, there have been hints that the UK version of the show is interested in employing Rima, who stands just one metre tall. And now, with rumours circulating of a "child-sized bed" being brought into the house, the press are speculating that Rima might be making a guest appearance on the show.

The trouble is she's still in the Big Bro house in Australia, and the series runs 'till July. So either someone will have to break her out and fly her to the UK, or it's all a load of rubbish as usual. What do you think?

Reality round-up: Chanelle's sex tape in full, Arlene's revelations, BNTM reviewed and Gillian McKeith's in rubber

We weren't fooled by the Chanelle 'sex tape' publicity stunt, but now the whole clip has been released I have to admit even Panto didn't expect it to be quite so... horrid. Here's the full thing. Do you find it amusing? Do you also laugh at those 118 118 posters?

And it's nail-biting stuff over at Strictly, as Arlene reveals the judges' contracts haven't been renewed. They've all been demanding more money, of course, which might have something to do with it.

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Chantelle to appear in ITV drama

Miss Celebrity Big Brother 2006 Chantelle Houghton has landed an ITV show that mirrors her own rise to, um, 'fame'. Chanters will appear in Whatever It Takes alongside starring The Legend Shane Richie.

In the new drama, a policewoman has an affair with a football player (Richie? Seriously?) and wakes up to find she's an overnight "celebrity" with her name in all the newspapers. Chantelle will play herself, offering advice to the policewoman as she tries to cope with her new-found fame. Whatever It Takes is due to be screened later this year.

Reality news round-up: Ian's got fired, Britain's Got Talent, Chantelle's got a boyfriend, Pinkham's got muscles, Cerys and Marc have got each other

Remember that one on The Apprentice who "couldn't even bring himself to say" the opposite of winner? Oh yeah, he got fired. Ian's gone, folks. I don't think he'll be missed too much.

Britain's Got Talent is back, this Saturday at 7:45pm on ITV1. Animals ran amok.

Chanelle and Chantelle have had a fun night out with a load of footballers, and good for them. Look what fun they're having! Almost makes me wish I was young again.

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Chanelle's single - "I Want It"

How have I not showed you this yet? Ladies and gentleman, je te présente Chanelle's single. She did say in an interview that it sounded "like recent Britney" and while I hate to admit it, she does have a point. Although is that just because they both sound more like futuristic positronic androids than 21st Century humans? The song is called "I want it" (not to be confused with "I want it *right naaah*, by Kandyfloss). Chanelle's new reality show - Chanelle:Wannabe Popstar - starts on April 18th at 9.30pm, on VH1. Enjoy.

Reality TV news: Kaplinsky's secret, Oliver's retort, Apprentice rumours, Jade's single again

Twinkle-toed Channel 5 newsreader Natasha Kaplinsky is three months pregnant. But who's the father? Oh, you are awful. It's handsome investment banker husband Justin Bower of course. Why, who else could it have been?

And it's time for that picture again in The Sun... Barrowman and Van Outen have hit back at Kevin Spacey's claims that the BBC talent shows aren't doing much to help theatre. New respect for Denise who suggests maybe Kev's annoyed because he's "too old to play Oliver".

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News round-up: Gareth's wedding, Chantelle's drunk and Cowell's rich - but it's all about Jordan really

Who else had forgotten or blocked out of their memory the fact that Gareth Gates had a fling with Jordan!!! So she's not invited to his wedding, it turns out. Gareth love, you can ignore it but that won't mean it never happened.

Talking of Jordan, her protege is learning well. What was Jordan's response to all this? Did she grab Chanters by her flimsy shoulders and shake her like a ragdoll, while booming "I CREATED YOU! AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?" Yes, of course. She also said "She's never going to be me."

Following on from the shock news that he has an expensive house, now it's being reported that Cowell has bought a very expensive car. He's a wealthy guy. He's going to have expensive stuff. Get over it.

Who's going to win American Idol? USA today think it's likely to be a boy. But it was probably a boy who wrote it, so we should take such "investigative journalism" in the "respected newspaper" USA Today with a pinch of salt.

There's going to be a Canadian version of How Clean is Your House! Aggie's performance on Ice obviously didn't damage the brand as much as we feared.

New reality show for Chanelle

Chanelle? Is that you? Are you still here? You realise all your mates left ages ago. Oh, alright then, we'll give you show for your bus fare home.

That's how it happened, folks. I was there. It's called Chanelle: Wannabe Popstar and it's all about the Posh worshipper's efforts to launch a music career. Chanelle has been signed to Eminence Records and will be given singing and dance lessons by David Laudat and K Knight before releasing her debut single and promo video. Let's hope she's a better singer than her idol.

Chanelle: Wannabe Popstar airs on April 18 at 9:30pm.

Big Brother news: Chantelle's addicted to fake tan

In a story worthy of The Onion, Celeb Big Brother winner and falling star Chantelle Houghton has become addicted to fake bake since splitting with Preston. She says it's her way of blocking out the pain.

Well, she actually said: "I have a spray-tan every two weeks and it keeps going deeper and deeper. I can't stop it. I'm trying to strip myself of everything that I was when i was with Preston."

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Big Brother twins - surprise sister!

Kept quiet about her, didn't they? Yes, we can now add a third, similar-faced member to our mental model of the Marchant clan. She might not have come from the same egg as the other two, but she is younger and she has a better hair cut... I wonder why they didn't want to shout about her.

Anyway, serious business: I need to think of a fruit for her - can you help? We've got orange and lemon right there, but what about Claire? Lime? Satsuma? If this new one doesn't have a fruit, I'm not sure we can keep talking about her.

Reality news round-up: Rock Rivals starting, Ziggy's clubbing, Burton's opening

Sean Gallagher wanted to wear high-waisted trunks on Rock Rivals, but the producers wouldn't let him. Spoil sports. Rock Rivals starts on March 5th, ITV1.

Sharon might be quitting the X Factor. All that stuff about her and Dannii tearing each other's hair out is sounding more convincing by the day.

Big Brother non-winner Ziggy is still making the news, this time through his frolics with a lady who, despite having a surprisingly pointy stomach, is still obviously out his league.

I'm a Celebrity star, chef John Burton Race, has managed to get backing for his restaurant from the internet millionaire behind lastminute.com, Clive Jacobs.

It's Brucie's 80th today (I know, only 80?) Happy Birthday old timer!

Pete Bennett and the Lovedogs: Cosmonaut

Big Brother 7 winner Pete and his band have finally cranked out their first single, and it's rather fun, in a sort of synthy 90s way. If you can't listen to it at work, just know that it sounds a bit like "Spaceman" by Babylon Zoo. If you don't remember Babylon Zoo, then I can teach you nothing. Bit worried about the hardware though. I don't think that's even a proper space ship. Cosmonaut (or as The Sun entertainingly insists on spelling it, Cosmonaught) will be released on March 3rd.