Reality news in the tabloids: More money for judges, more attention for Louis, less phone selling for Paul Potts

The Strictly Come Dancing judges want more monies... I think they're a bit jealous of the X Factor judges, who get paid 10 times what they do, and also, as it happens, want more monies.

Paul Potts has decided to take the plunge and give up his phone selling job. The Sun says: "He was on extended leave as he toured the world performing to thousands, but was too scared to resign in case it had all been a DREAM". For heaven's sakes.

"They've managed to mess it up completely." Hmm? What's Louis Walsh's beef with Rock Rivals, I wonder? "There's far more drama on the X Factor in any week than there's likely to be in this whole series. I was so excited when I sat down to watch it. I expected it to be great. I had spent a whole day on set doing a cameo and they cut me." Aha. I think we have encountered what's known as "the rub".

X Factor: Shayne Ward's first audition

Apologies for the poor quality of this clip, but it appears to be the only video evidence of Shayne's first audition that exists on the internet. I hope you enjoy it and it makes you want to say "young man" in a Harry Enfield voice.

The X Factor: Leona's first audition

You love this stuff, admit it. Here's Leona Lewis's first ever audition. Also, put 'em away Paula - family show! Jeez.

Reality TV Moments Of The Year #6

X Factor this time, you know it. You remember this one, don't you? She was basically a little mouse, and she sang "My Way" in the tiniest voice in the world. And OH! I could just EAT HER UP!

Guess which reality star is in this picture?

When Catwalk Queen (sister site of Panto) asks "who's the glam beauty with the wind whipped hair, sun-kissed skin and the glamorous, glittering Dolce & Gabana gown?" my usual answer is "I have absolutely no idea." I'm not sure what Harper's Bazaar is either. I think it might be a magazine. Either way, a star of reality TV is gracing this picture... can you guess who it is?

Click below for the answer

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Classic X Factor - Gillian McKeith gets slaughtered on X Factor

Joyless hunched moo, Gillian McKeith, starred on X Factor and sang The Shoop Shoop Song. If your ears don't curl up like pork scratchings, listen out for Cowell's put-downs. Non-human? Brilliant. She really does deserve everything she gets.

Classic X Factor - Damon gets the chop

"Better than Justin Timberlake." Somewhere between "Luther Vandross and Stevie Wonder." That's Damon... one of a long line of losers on X Factor unceremoniously booted off for being arse.