Some spiritual guides visit us in our dreams. Alan Sugar has an equally disconcerting habit of texting people his life advice and opinions. There was that fight with Piers where the Britain's Got Talent host called him a 'revolting human being'. And now Alan is getting SMS RSI all over again for young Alex Wotherspoon. Alex told Heat: "Sir Alan texted me saying, 'I know you are business through and through, and I know if you were going do modeling, you would do it alongside.'" I mean, what the hell, Sir Alan?! Are you a 14 year old girl? Pick up the phone, you coward! If you lurrrrve him, just tell him! Everyone likes to be told.

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