Heatworld insists you HAVE to see these pictures from Lembit and Gabriela's engagement party. But I checked, and it turns out you don't.

There's a reality tv story intersection to beat them all, featuring as it does Strictly's Matt di Angelo, his dancing lover Flavia, Michelle from Liberty X, and the Daily Mail using the phrase "love rat".

And hold the front page! I have some breaking news you NEED to know before proceeding with your humdrum life... Apparently Myleene Klass felt fat in THAT bikini. No, rather misleadingly - not that one, that one.

Came straight to this page? Visit www.availableforpanto.com for all the latest news.

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