Twinkle-toed Channel 5 newsreader Natasha Kaplinsky is three months pregnant. But who's the father? Oh, you are awful. It's handsome investment banker husband Justin Bower of course. Why, who else could it have been?

And it's time for that picture again in The Sun... Barrowman and Van Outen have hit back at Kevin Spacey's claims that the BBC talent shows aren't doing much to help theatre. New respect for Denise who suggests maybe Kev's annoyed because he's "too old to play Oliver".

If you're interested in that sort of thing, the tabloids reckon loads of Alan's Apprentices have shady pasts. Don't shoot! I am but a conduit.

...and according to that fine upstanding pillar of truth and justice that is The Daily Star, Jade's dumped her bloke Jack Tweedy after discovering he 'can't be trusted'. You hear that? Get in there while you can, lads!

This is Available for Panto, reading The Star so you don't have to, since 2007.

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