Ever get the feeling that John McCririck misses being on telly? Why else would he roll up at Hell’s Kitchen with his own picnic hamper packed with food? It wouldn't be so bad, but this is the second time John and his wife Booby have dined here – and they pulled the same stunt last time, too, says Unreality TV.

When Marco found out that John wanted the starter (Consomme of Wild Mushrooms and Truffle En Croute) without the pastry, he wasn't impressed: “Can’t do it...Tell him to have his hamper.”

In the end, John ordered the dish anyway and removed the pastry himself when it arrived. Amazing what you can achieve when you put your mind to it, eh John? Model of decorum that he is, John exclaimed: “It’s only half full. Look at this and how greasy it is. It’s solid grease.” Maitre'D Nick explained that the "grease" is kind of expensive grease... it's fois gras and truffle oil.

Meanwhile, Bonnie Langford was having second thoughts about ordering the fish after finding a hair in it. But when Nick tried to take the plate away to report to Marco, Bonnie protested and wouldn't let him. Probably wise.

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