So, Flanners has left the house after a blazing row with Ziggy. In the interests of appearing modern and hip, I should merge their names. Chac? Zigelle? Gazelle? Of course, they were called Chiggy, which to me, sounds like slang for chewing gum, which is quite apt really. The main BB8 relationship was something that lost flavour very quickly and was promptly stuck under the table and now, has gone all hard.

People (I'm looking at you Heat magazine) feel the need to take sides in this break-up, which for me, seems a little bit daft. I say daft, I mean absolutely preposterous. Both people involved in this relationship can be classed as morons who have made error after textbook error. The lack of listening, the lack of understanding exactly what they'd got themselves into. In short, a holiday romance was blown out of all proportion and now, the simple minded of you out there, are taking sides.

The row saw some of my loathed actions in human beings... and I don't just mean stupidity. There is nothing worse than seeing two loud idiots airing their dirty laundry in public. As the house ran for cover, or in the case of the twins, sat aghast and dumbfounded, Ziggy and Chanelle slung mud at each other in an attempt to seem righteous and fair. In reality, they resembled to warring alcoholics outside a pub warring about who put the most quids in the gas meter.

Ziggy, overly sincere and patronising, buggered up any chances of being universally loved by blindly pawing around in someone's feelings, and quite often, ruining things by crying off to go home... with his shirt off. Of course, calling Flan-elle by his ex-girlfriend's name doesn't help him either. So, Chanelle? Well, perpetually playing the (and pardon my language here) wounded wanker card, Flanners was left looking childish and moronic. Her arguments have always revolved around "I know you are you said you are" and "I knerr, but, you said, I knerr, but, you said, I knerr, but, you said..." Both have been dumped upon, but let's not get sucked in. They're both quite clearly dimwitted. One has walked and the other is soon to be evicted. Betcha. [Mof Gimmers]

-->

Came straight to this page? Visit www.availableforpanto.com for all the latest news.