It's the last day. The Last Day. The! Last! Day!

And as I type this on my laptop from my quiet spot underneath Carole's bed, my head is awash with questions... questions the housemates must be asking too. Who will win? And will they wear matching outfits when they do? What will happen next? Did I turn the oven off before I came out? Would you like me to be the cat?

Most of all I'm wondering whether Jonty can pull out the stops and bring home the bacon for me tonight. He's a bit of an oddball, granted, and he's got a very wide parting, to be sure, but I've got ten bob riding on that gleaming head, and right now I don't give a damn what he has to do, so long as he does it. No, don't say it, I know what you're thinking... if I have one vice, it's that I care too much. Carole would sympathise. And to be honest according to today's stats she'd be good for a few bob too. So come on oldies! Slow and steady wins the race!

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