Okay. Big Brother is underway, and like it or not, we've already judged everyone in the house and they're already going to have claw their way back into our affections. Unique in TV, Big Brother forces us all into snap decisions on whether we like someone or not. Of course, we do this every time we switch a new show on, but no other show makes us quite as vocal about it. When was the last time you saw Kevin McCloud getting booed on the way into a house?

Well, first on the nation's hate list is surely Charley (pictured above with her 'angels'). On entering the house, she was greeted with jeers and the cries of "GET A JOB - GET A JOB" which was actually quite funny. On entering the house, the girls twigged at the lack of blokes. Shabnam quipped "We'll have to go lesbian!" to which Charley unleashed some unpleasant homophobic dribble. I wouldn't be surprised if she's first out on that count. So what of the rest?

By and large, my first impressions were spot on. The twins, Amanda and Sam, are certainly destined for some horrific Nuts photoshoot, nipple-to-nipple, possibly sucking lollipops in a suggestive manner, and look for all the world like people who should be put in a home for attention needy twins (if such a thing exists). Not being a tabloid journalist, I haven't had access to their past, but I'm betting it hasn't been a happy one. They scream (literally) "NEED ME!"

While everyone else kinda lumps into one mound of non-human mess, one stand out is Lesley. Lesley has already had some kind of nervous breakdown it seems. On her first night, we saw her weeping at a bed and weeping at the stars. Was it joy? Was it sorrow? I think it was a 50/50 split. She's locked in a house full of vacuous women who scream at the site of plants (that'd be the twins again) and squeal at the sight of a fridge (again, the twins). All Lesley can hope for is that BB chuck in a bloke that suits her personality on Friday or she'll surely end up topping herself live on air... and I don't think BBs weird birdsong overdub will make that any less shattering to watch.

So the blokes? I dare say that over the weeks we'll have a slew of chaps getting thrown in like unpinned grenades. With BB seemingly having a penchant for the older housemate (with two this year - Lesley and Carole) you would have thought that there is a chance that some older gents will be entering the house... or else it seems a bit pointless having two old dears in who will inevitably get voted out by virtue of the fact that they're a bit older.

Of course, I've failed to mention one big character in the house and that's Tracey. Tracey is amazingly needy. Yelling "phat" and "'ave it" at almost anything that moves, Tracey has given us the greatest BB exchange in years when, sitting with Lesley, she had to translate entire sentences. Tracey said something about a "phat feeling" and Lesley asked politely if she ever had "thin ones". Brilliant.

So who are the faves at this early stage? Well, Laura (plump and Welsh) seems to be the runaway leader. She is down to earth (she has a regional accent and isn't cockney... this is how we can tell) and friendly. Her portly pose endears her to the public as she isn't a thong occupier like Charley et al. You heard it here first. Laura is going to win BB8.

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